New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
