Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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