your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize