i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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