He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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