im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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