I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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