Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Randomize
