i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize