everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
