I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
