Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
