Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize