So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
