shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
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