Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Randomize
