my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
