My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.