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• (253): View more from Washington

  My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.

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• (206): View more from Washington

  remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?

  (206): View more from Washington

  joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (108): View more from

  Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly

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• (318): View more from Louisiana

  If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE

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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were

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• (308): View more from Nebraska

  On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.

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