oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
i came on her dog
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize