yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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