There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
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Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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