marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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