Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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