I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize