I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.