TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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