And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
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so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
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Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
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