But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
