Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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