If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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