We won't sleep together?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
