Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
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