Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
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