He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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