Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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