Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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