found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
