i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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