is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
