I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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