So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize