Im at strip club and am horny
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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