she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
