i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
