I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
