Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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  (517): and trust me i need no booty pop lessons http://tfl.nu/h5fy
  Replies (2) Good night (1842) Bad night (1124)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.

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  (402): Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement. http://tfl.nu/h6nw
  Replies (43) Good night (734) Bad night (6386)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  oh fat girl friday strikes again...

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  (724): oh fat girl friday strikes again... http://tfl.nu/rgt0
  Replies (60) Good night (770) Bad night (4303)
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  (310): View more from California

  Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING

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  (310): Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING http://tfl.nu/6fv4
  Replies (24) Good night (1070) Bad night (8803)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?

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  (917): Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage? http://tfl.nu/cpvo
  Replies (12) Good night (5409) Bad night (774)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.

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  (828): I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse. http://tfl.nu/gxwi
  Replies (14) Good night (4284) Bad night (866)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  "must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.

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  (856): "must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls. http://tfl.nu/lfhc
  Replies (13) Good night (3340) Bad night (818)
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  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes

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  (902): You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes http://tfl.nu/flaw
  Replies (26) Good night (1903) Bad night (4161)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.

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  (401): I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs. http://tfl.nu/di07
  Replies (8) Good night (3581) Bad night (1376)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.

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  (508): I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again. http://tfl.nu/jeja
  Replies (4) Good night (1078) Bad night (2957)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.

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  (409): The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens. http://tfl.nu/kai5
  Replies (44) Good night (3702) Bad night (923)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina

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  (540): Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina http://tfl.nu/3vzn
  Replies (2) Good night (1032) Bad night (296)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there

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  (402): You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there http://tfl.nu/v9qy
  Replies (2) Good night (1465) Bad night (326)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.

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  (480): I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight. http://tfl.nu/cc82
  Replies (4) Good night (397) Bad night (760)
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  (415): View more from California

  We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home

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  (415): We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home http://tfl.nu/a6an
  Replies (1) Good night (680) Bad night (191)

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