You can't special order awesome
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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