holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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