Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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