sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
